Singable Limerick-Medley (Quebec ballad): STRUGGLING with FRENCH

POST #162:
Singable Limerick-Medley 

ORIGINAL SONG: These verses could be sung to the standard "The Limerick Song", as per YouTube here. However, for this post, we have used a different tune, the melody for the verses of the 1970s French-Canadian hit. "La Complainte du Phoque en Alaska" by the band Beau Dommage. The Quebec cowboy type melody is mixed with elements of circus music, and in fact a calliope is a major element in orchestration of the original piece.
Deep thanks to Steve McNie of Toronto Ukes, whose chord chart provided the basis for current version; any errors are likely due to the key transposition by G.C.
LIMERICK VERSE:  Original verses composed by Giorgio Coniglio 2016-2017, and compiled in December 2017. Several of the verses also appear in the online limerick dictionary OEDILF.com.
WORDPLAY LINK: Further limerick verses dealing with French words and concepts can be found on our companion wordplay blog "EDIFYING NONSENSE" in the post about "SAVOIR-FAIRE"



CONTENTS:
1. Gallicism(e)
2. French Loanwords
3. Québécois (Joual)
4. French Wench
5. French Enologists

STRUGGLING WITH FRENCH 

A LIMERICK-MEDLEY

(to the tune of verses of "La Complainte du Phoque en Alaska")



1. Gallicisme? Its origin: - - (it’s) French
A coquette: a flirtatious French wench.

R S V (won't you), Please; a massage: rub and squeeze,
Rendezvous, tête-à-tête, or a clench.

2. À propos of French loanwords, - - I'd say

Spoofing poets spout words like outré.

So, sans cesse I have cursed that so few are well-versed,

Quant à moi, a unique nonpareil.

3. The ACcent / ahk-SOHN  --- Québécois
Doesn't equal French studied by moi.

Speaking joual, what they say sounds much more like 'mo-AY';

If I speak, I'll blurt, "Mw-é, j'parle pas.”  

4. I must say there's no word worse for rhyming  with ‘French’

Than that somewhat archaic term 'wench'.

You're put off by a klaxon (the horn honks, "Anglo-Saxon"),

Then you'll notice your appetence quench.

5. French enologists  --- don't talk a bunch,
But they'll use the word grappe — that's my hunch.
For them, grapes are raisins; they choose crus to make vins.
Check what vintage they order with lunch.

(For explanation of the French words, and some more intriguing poems, refer to the blogpost "SAVOIR-FAIRE")

UKULELE-FRIENDLY FORMAT

(Click on any chord-chart slide to move to 'song-presentation mode'; then navigate through thumbnails at bottom of page.)

WORDPLAY LINK: 

For wordplay (palindromes, anagrams, eggcorns, creative cartography, etc.) and silly poetry (limericks, including some more French-tinged offerings), see our sister blog "EDIFYING NONSENSE" here. 

ORIGINAL SONG-LYRICS