Kokomo Revisited: Nifty Ways To Leave Your Mukluks

POST #73
PASTICHE of 2 ORIGINAL SONGS: parodysitism??

RECIPIENT SONG (music): "Fifty Ways To Leave Your Lover", Paul Simon, 1975.

INVADING SONG (lyrics): words and themes borrowed liberally from "Kokomo" 1988, as performed by the Beach Boys.
PARODY COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, February, 2015. 

KEYWORDS: goldenoldy, modernsong, parodysitism

Imagine that Paul Simon sang about a mid-winter  escape to the Beach Boys' mythic Caribbean destination of Kokomo; with a nod to recent weather reports. 

NIFTY WAYS TO LEAVE YOUR MUKLUKS

(to the tune of "Fifty Ways to Leave Your Lover")

“Your problem is worsened by this nasty winter freeze,

Let's get away to moonlit nights off the Florida Keys.

We’ll defy gravity, perfect our chemistry;

There are some nifty ways to leave your mukluks”.

She said, “Escape it all for a great place to go.

And by jet we’ll get way down there fast, then we can take it slow,

Everybody knows a dreamy place like Kokomo –

There are some nifty ways to leave your mukluks.”

Nifty ways to leave your mukluks.

All-inclu’ in Aru’, Lou

Bake in Jamaic’, Jake

A month in Bermud’, dude

Just get ourselves warm.

Few weeks in Baham’, Sam,

Don’t need lots of lead-time,

Mellow Montego, Joe

No snow – Largo Key.

       

Feel mystique -  Martinique, Zeke
Glimpse Port-au-Prince, Vince

Survey Montserrat, Matt

Bodies in hot sand.

Lounge in St Kitts, Fritz

Rhythm of a steel-drum band

Hop bars in Negril, Bill

And get yourself tanned.

She said, “It peeves me so, car battery has died.

And our street has not been plowed so all you’d do is slip and slide."

I said ”Snow day -  there’s little open, so nowhere else to ride –

Back to those nifty ways.”

She said, “Let’s try a snowy afternoon delight

Then we could drink some hot toddies and dream of those tropic nights.”

And because I kept on shivering, I called to book a flight,

I yearned for nifty ways to leave my mukluks.

Tour the bay by kayak, Jack

Get a new tan, Stan

Cruise to St Croix, Roy

Get keen on Holguín.

Surf Los Cabos, Gus

Don’t need skates or puck much

Explore cays and keys, Lee

mukluks -  seldom thought of
 as sensuous

Just pack your sun-screen.

Scuba-dive off Arub’, Stu

Flake in Jamaic’, Jake

Swim nude in Bermud’, dude

Live what Beach Boys sing.

On lam in Baham’, Sam,

No need to trudge slush much

Just toke in Mo'Bay, mam'

A 'Kokomo' fling.

Performing Notes: 

Only a few harder chords here:
G6 = 0,1,0,1; FM7 =2,4,1,0 (5,5,0,0 will also do it) ; E9 = 1,2,2,2; G#dim7 = 1,2,1,2; Eb6 = 3,3,3,3

[Am] “Your problem is [G6] worsened by this [FM7] nasty winter [E9] freeze, [E7]

Let's [Am] get away to [G#dim7] moonlit nights [B7] off the Florida Keys.

[Am] We’ll defy [G6] gravity, per[FM7]fect our chemis[E9]try; [E7]

There are some [Am] nifty [Dm7] ways to leave your [Am] mukluks”.

All-inclu’ in [C] Aru’, Lou

Bake in Ja[Eb6]maic’, Jake

A month in Ber[F7]mud’, dude

Just get ourselves [C] warm.

Few weeks in Baham’, Sam,

Don’t need lots of [Eb6] lead-time,

Mellow Monte[F7]go, Joe

No snow – Largo [C] Key.