Uke-Lament for the Undefended Border: "AN ALIEN HEADING SOUTH"

PARODY-LYRICS, subbed into 2 songs.

ORIGINAL SONG#1:  "Mr. Spaceman" , The Byrds, 
1966 -  verses 1,2, and 10.
ORIGINAL SONG #2. " Englishman in New York", Sting, 1987 - all other parody verses.

PARODY COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, November, 2014.

Lexicon:

Pair-ody = satirical lyrics substituted into a mix of 2 original songs

DHS = Department of Homeland Security

CRA = Canada Revenue Agency

BNL = Barenaked Ladies, a well-known Canadian band

ALIEN HEADING SOUTH

(to the tune of "Mr Spaceman")

 Woke up this morning, an odd taste in my mouth, and 

Then I realized we were due to head south,

 Warm U.S. cottage, with dual-cit. spouse - 
I hope they won’t keep me out.

Hey, DHS-man, I really hate to ask -  I'd 

like to stay the max.

Hey, DHS-man, won’t you please let me in for 6 months.

(to the tune of "Alien in New York")

Hey, Mister Inquisitor, I’m just a snowbird-visitor,

I'm sure that I am not the only one;
I’ve sent “Closer Connection”-form, in IRS’s direction, for

I plan to live and die a native son. 

You’ll find no trace of felony, of villainy or zealotry

I’m not the sort who plans to overstay.

ISIS I repudiate, I file my taxes never late,

In fact I’m on good terms with CRA. 

I don't drink Starbuck's, just Tim Horton's, Sir,

Always a donut on the side,

I take my hockey gear everywhere I walk,

I’m myself, a trailer-park Canuck.    Whoa-.

 –oh, Not some alien: visiting Canadian

A Canadian with his puck. Whoa

–oh, Not some alien: ally, friend, and then some

A Canadian with his puck.  

If music makes the man, and threats you rate,
Then I'm the zero of the day,
I play my Lightfoot, Twain, Dion and Stompin' Tom
BNL, Avril, Biebs or Buble.
  
I'll trade my "loonies" at your banks to shop,

I won’t take anybody’s job, 

I’ll hide my views on climate-change and gun-control,

And no one should take me for a snob.  Whoa


 –oh, Not some alien: passported Canadian

 A Canadian with his puck. Say 

–eh, Not some alien: ally, friend, and then some

 A Canadian with his puck.  

(to the tune of "Mr Spaceman")
Hey, DHS-man, I know the rules can change; I

won’t do anything strange.

Hey, DHS-man, won’t you please let me in for a while.

(to the tune of "Alien in New York")
Say, "eh", Not some alien: visiting Canadian

A Canadian with his puck. Say 

–eh, Not some alien: ally, friend, and then some

A Canadian with his puck.  

UKULELE-FRIENDLY FORMAT
(Click on any chord-chart slide to move to 'song-presentation mode'; then navigate through thumbnails at bottom of page.)